Caffeine That Hits Harder Than Cangu Traffic
Yes, we have decaf, but we don’t like to talk about it.
Decaf? Sure
If you also enjoy watching sports on mute and eating pizza without cheese. This isn’t a hipster soy-foam-art experiment; it’s the no-nonsense coffee Bali sports bar. Real coffee. The kind that gets you through Monday, helps you forget last night, and keeps you awake to watch your team lose without crying.
This is Coffee in Bali
For people who want caffeine, not poetry. We don’t sweeten it, we don’t make it fancy, and we don’t care if it “tastes a bit intense.” It’s meant to do the job. Our coffee is the pre-game fuel for anyone who knows beer is coming but needs to look responsible first.
Yelling at the Referee Before Kickoff
It might have you yelling at the referee before the match even starts — perfect for the 3 AM Champions League kickoff or a long day of questionable sports predictions.
The Coffee Rules
☕ Order a latte? We’ll assume you lost a bet.
☕ Order decaf? We’ll assume you don’t even like sports.
Drink up, then switch to beer. That’s the game plan — and the only warm-up we believe in.
Top 20 Funny Coffee Facts You Probably Didn’t Know ☕
(Weird coffee trivia for people who drink caffeine, not poetry.)
1. Coffee is the second most traded commodity in the world. Number one? Oil. So yes — your car and your body both run on black liquid.
2. The first webcam ever was invented just to monitor a coffee pot at Cambridge University. Lazy? No… efficient.
3. Beethoven counted exactly 60 coffee beans per cup. Call it precision brewing or early barista art.
4. Coffee was once banned in Mecca in 1511 because it made people too social. Party killers.
5. In old Turkey, a woman could legally divorce her husband if he didn’t provide enough coffee. Respect.
6. Kopi Luwak, the world’s most expensive coffee, is made from beans that have passed through a civet cat. Literally poop coffee.
7. In the 17th century, England’s King tried to ban coffee houses because people talked too much about politics in them.
8. In 1674, English women petitioned against coffee, claiming it made men “useless in bed.” Beer lobby conspiracy?
9. The first coffee drinkers chewed the beans instead of brewing them. Instant espresso, ancient style.
10. Coffee has more flavors than wine — yet we drink it daily without posting long tasting notes on Instagram.
11. Finland drinks more coffee per person than any other country — around 12 kg a year. Probably because it’s dark half the time.
12. Instant coffee gum was once a thing. And yes, it failed miserably.
13. NASA created a special coffee cup so astronauts can drink coffee in space. Priorities.
14. Coffee helps you poop. That’s not a myth — it’s biology.
15. In Italy, drinking cappuccino after 11 AM is as socially unacceptable as wearing socks with sandals.
16. In some countries, coffee is served with butter or cheese in it. Yes, cheese.
17. It is possible to overdose on caffeine… but you’d need about 100 cups in a day. Good luck.
18. Coffee is often called “brain juice” — basically legal speed in a mug.
19. The first espresso machines were designed to shorten workers’ coffee breaks. Genius boss move.
20. A coffee IV drip doesn’t officially exist — but if someone starts selling it, we’re buying.
Coffee Machine: Meet Silvia ☕
Our Rancilio Silvia is basically the Messi of coffee machines:
- Small
- Reliable
- Doesn’t choke under pressure
If you want Starbucks-style caramel cloud unicorn lattes — this isn’t the place.
If you want coffee that tastes like victory (or at least keeps you awake when your team loses), Silvia’s got you.
“No foamy drama, just serious espresso.”